Christmas 2007

 

Well dear family of friends, here we go again…only this time I am sending out our “Best Wishes to you and yours for a wonder-filled Holiday Season” from beautiful Richmond, B.C., where I am now quite happily adjusting to living the vision I could only dream about as I penned my annual Christmas message last year!!! And what a difference a year can make…when we are steadfast in holding onto those dreams and visions…especially when we remain patient and open to the possibilities AND are also able to be a little flexible and prepared to compromise when the “vision” doesn’t turn out to be exactly the one you had pictured in your dreams!

 

One thing that has remained true and consistent with my previous annual messages is the fact that I am behind schedule in composing my thoughts and this message to all of you!!! It seems that no matter how good my intentions are to get this letter written each year, life has a way of throwing me off schedule. Last year it was due to computer challenges…this year it has been because I’ve been so busy dealing with all the exciting and occasionally challenging changes that have happened in our lives since my move to B.C. in September. Trust me when I say that is not an exaggeration or an excuse …for this past year has brought a multitude of them our way!!!!!

 

Our new reality is vastly different than anything we had imagined, and one we are still adjusting to…but the good news is…WE ARE TOGETHER ONCE AGAIN… PERMANENTLY this time…and we are enjoying celebrating that gift each and every day!

 

As most of you are already aware of the many challenges and changes that have happened to us this past year, I’ll try not to repeat myself (and potentially bore you with the details again) and instead I will do my best to focus on the positive results of the life lessons the Universe put in our path.  It has been an incredible journey, complete with several detours and bumps along the way…but then isn’t that true of life and its inherent lessons for all of us??? It also happens to be the “theme” of this year’s annual message that I’ve chosen to share with all of you…and that is…contrary to popular belief (my own included!)…our greatest gifts in life come to us while we are on that journey and not necessarily when we reach the destination or goal we had in mind when we initially set out to reach it!!

 

Don’t’ get me wrong…I’m thrilled that we were able to attain our initial goal…that of selling our home and me moving to B.C. and being reunited with my family permanently! However, I am also human, and I’ve done my fair share of worrying, bitching and complaining along the way when “attaining that goal” didn’t exactly take the path we had hoped or envisioned and I frequently wonder “why” the journey couldn’t have been a little less bumpy and the transition from “cocooning to spreading our wings” wasn’t a little easier to make. So please bear with me as I use that thought as a perfect segue to share the following parable, which you may have read or heard before…

 

AT THE WATER'S EDGE

At the water’s edge I found a cocoon of a butterfly.
One day a small opening appeared.
I sat and watched the butterfly for several hours
as it struggled to force its body through that little hole.

Then it seemed to stop making any progress.
It appeared as if it had gotten as far as it could, and it could go no further.
So I decided to help the butterfly.
I took a pair of scissors and snipped off the remaining bit of the cocoon.
The butterfly then emerged easily.
But it had a swollen body and small, shrivelled wings.
I continued to watch the butterfly because
I expected that, at any moment, the wings would enlarge
and expand to be able to support the body,
which would contract in time.
Neither happened!
In fact, the butterfly spent the rest of its life
crawling around with a swollen body and shrivelled wings.
It never was able to fly.

What I, in my kindness and haste, did not understand was that the restricting cocoon and the struggle required for the butterfly to get through the tiny opening were God’s way of forcing fluid from the body of the butterfly into its wings so that it would be ready for flight once it achieved its freedom from the cocoon.

Sometimes struggles are exactly what we need in our lives.
If we were allowed to go through our lives without any obstacles, it would cripple us.
We would not be as strong as what we could have been.
We could never fly!
I asked for strength ...
But I was given difficulties to make me strong.
I asked for wisdom ...
But I was given problems to solve.
I asked for prosperity ...
But I was given brain and brawn to work.
I asked for courage ...
But I was given danger to overcome.
I asked for love ...
But I was given troubled people to help.
I asked for favours ...
But I was given opportunities.
I received nothing I wanted ...
I received everything I needed!

 

Now you might well be asking yourselves what this “parable” has got to do with anything? Somehow, for me, it seemed appropriate to compare our personal journey to that of this butterfly for we have experienced a number of struggles along the way, especially in the last seven and half years since we lost Adam. Although our “challenges” have not been exclusively limited to that timeframe, the butterfly and its significance and symbolism relating to transition, growth and transformation has gained an even more powerful meaning and personal significance to our family as a connection to Adam and the painful lessons we have learned as a result of our loss as well as the benevolent abundance of gifts and attributes we have gained during the transitions we have each had to make along the way.

As our personal journey unfolded…so too have the com-parables of said journey been made clear to us and thankfully the attributing skills and life lessons been gained!

Bearing in mind that the skills and attributes are the following… strength, wisdom, prosperity, courage, love and favours….I will leave it up to you to discern which ones you believe apply to each challenge and change, because I personally believe they frequently worked in tandem! I would also like to invite you to take some quiet time for reflection over the holiday season, on all that you have gained from your personal journey this past year. You might even surprise yourself once you do this little exercise… it could just alter your perspective a little regarding those “challenges” you went through and open your eyes to the gifts you gained along the way!

Bob left his position at Upper Valley in Chilliwack to move on to a new and better position with Priority Management and had to physically move twice in less than six months!...He now is able to work “normal hours” and enjoy “free time” which was virtually unheard of at this time last year. We have also been gifted with a benefits package, where before there was none, which really proved beneficial for us once my dental challenges of the past several months began to occur. The second move not only brought him much closer to work but also allowed our “beasties” and I to move in once the house was sold in Amherstburg, as most apartment building out here don’t allow pets!

While Bob was coping with his own changes and challenges, I too had to learn to handle a number of new responsibilities when it came to maintaining and looking after the day to day challenges that arose with our home while it was up for sale. Not only keeping it clean and pretty for viewing at a moment’s notice…but also sorting out and resolving a number of breakdowns, mini catastrophes related to plumbing and a host of other household duties I had never had to handle on my own before!... All of which helped me (and others) to realize I was a lot more capable than I would have ever given myself credit for in the past, and even better… that you CAN “teach an old dog new tricks”… when absolutely necessary!!!!

The house in Amherstburg finally got sold late this summer, at a much lower price than we had hoped or anticipated. We were always led to believe that investments in property are “supposed” to appreciate in value! The good news is that we were able to sell our home, despite the dramatic economic downturn in the local economy. We learned that downsizing and letting go of material possessions was far easier to accept and do than holding onto them or shipping them could ever be, especially when it meant that not only were we going to be free of the financial burdens that had weighed us down for so long in trying to carry the expenses of running two households… but that we could finally be together again… permanently! It allowed several friends, family members and strangers to add a few new items (and memories) to their own possessions for a good deal AND added a few dollars to our coffers which helped us to begin recreating our home anew in B.C.!

That impossibly short deadlines and the added stressors of meeting them can and will induce panic, even when you’ve been hoping and praying for a “SOLD” sign to appear!... Bob’s new employers generously gave him the needed time off to come home and help me organize and manage the move. Meghan’s equally generous employers paid for her to have one last trip “home” to help and say her goodbyes (again). We were fortunately blessed to receive the loving and generously supportive assistance of fantastic friends and family members which enabled us to meet that deadline (and even fit in some time for socializing!)… once again proving to all of us that “when the going gets tough, the tough get going”… and “where’s there’s a will there’s a way!”… thanks to all of you!!!!

The painfully difficult wrench it was to leave those friends and family members behind and begin our new life in B.C… Bob managed to bring our beasties safely here by plane and they have settled in nicely despite their considerably smaller new living conditions. I made the long and sometimes daunting trek across thousands of miles alone, despite weather conditions, traffic and construction, mountainous terrain and dental challenges encountered along the way. Throughout it all I managed to stay in touch and allay the fears and concerns others had for my “solo trek”, even as they lent me their support and loving encouragement along the way… and I’m also happy to say that those blessed gifts and connections have continued between us, through the internet and a great long distance phone plan, since I arrived and began to make my own adjustments to the new smaller environment when the occasional “blues” set in because of being so far away from all those people we hold near and dear to our hearts!!

And it wasn’t too long after my safe arrival before we began to add a few new chapters and challenges to our adventurous journey… I had to overcome my fear of dentists and deal with and inordinate number of expensive and painful sessions, but was fortunate to have been directed to a great new dentist through Meghan and her helpful boss!... We managed to get all those boxes unpacked AND find a place to store the excess (even though we ended up giving more of our “stuff” away here too) AND we have personalized and transformed our daughter’s old apartment into our new home!...We rekindled connections with our “kids” (Meghan, Sarah, B and Laura) and another couple of friends, Ron and Lisa (who are also recent transplants from Ontario) and even got to share and enjoy a brief visit with our mutual old friends, Rodey and Marj, from Rockwood!...We’ve even done our best to make a few new connections we hope will grow and prosper through Bob joining a local pool league and my discovering a new spiritual community in White Rock that we will both enjoy exploring once we make that next move!!!!

Did I forget to mention that what began as an exploration of “future possibilities” in locating an area we might enjoy living in (and commuting from for Bob) has now become our newest adventure and challenge??? We purchased a townhouse/condo in White Rock…and we take possession of it on December 13^th!!!! It is actually comparable in size to our current apartment/home  (about 1/5^th the size of our A’burg home)… so it’s a good thing we have made a comfortable transition to “downsizing”… and the other UP-side is there’s a whole LOT LESS cleaning to do!!! Best of all… the view is truly phenomenal, and lends us a panoramic vision of the mountains and ocean to enjoy and inspire us each and every day!!!!!! However… as it is in an older complex, our new place is in need of a bit of a facelift… so… the renovations and remodeling of same will begin two days after we hold the deed!!!... thankfully with the help of those good friends, Ron and Lisa (those Ontario transplants I mentioned earlier)… who I’m also happy and relieved to say have a lot more experience in doing that kind of stuff and have generously “offered” to share and assist us in doing some of the work. You see, we are hoping to do a lot of that work ourselves… so not only will we be doing new and different things, with re-newed old friends… it will be a uniquely new way to spend the holiday season and I have no doubt whatsoever… we WILL ALSO BEGIN A WHOLE NEW SERIES OF ADVENTURES… TO SHARE WITH ALL OF YOU… IN THE NEW YEAR TOO!!!!

So, as you can clearly see, we are still working our way toward making our “vision” a reality. It may have altered dramatically from what it once was, but we will not “let go” of the dreams we truly “need” to realize… hopefully utilizing all those skills and attributes I believe we have gained along the way… savouring the journey and learning whatever life lessons we are meant to along the way… and making our final destination, whatever and wherever it may be… a place to call home… together!!!

...which brings me to the inevitable conclusion and invitation we gladly extend to you, our dear friends and family each year… that our home remains open to you all… whatever the season or reason ( although the accommodations may be smaller!) and just so you know… we will continue to eagerly embrace “new traditions” this year too, even though we will deeply miss those we’ve shared with many of you in the past… and once again I am about to embark on the latest ever Christmas shopping I have done, wedged between materials sourcing and shopping, demolishing and re-new-ing our fabulous new home!!!

And so… until next we see you… may your holidays be filled with love, laughter and warm memories ~ both old and new~ and may your hearts hold a healing light and positive glow, filled to overflowing with love and heartfelt intentions, along with the passionate feelings, skills and attributes I know you have also gained this past year… and may they also manifest further within you and your circle of loved ones you hold dear to your heart.

Love and namaste,

 Sue, Bob & Meghan

 

P.S. For any of you who are still wondering about that book I collaborated on two summers ago…it has been handed off to a new editor/publishing team… and it “may” hit the shelves in 2008… IF that is what is meant to happen… and hopefully the skills and attributes I’ve gained this year will help me to deal with whatever way things play